We have several dads here at NFI who are expecting their second child (congrats, Paul and Mike!), and as you all know, Vince and his wife just welcomed little Vinny a couple of weeks ago.
It's interesting to hear their stories as they prep for the newborn. And it's also interesting to see how much new dads get ignored.
Several guys noticed that "dads" weren't even referred to at the hospital tour. Only "moms" and "support partners." Then, Paul's wife received a packet of information/samples, which included a teeny, tiny little brochure for him, choc-full of unhelpful, condescending information, and a url for him to visit that was centered around the word "mom."
This is part of the reason why NFI has developed our Healthcare programming and the New Dad's Pocket Guide, because we know how important it is to recognize and engage dads right from the start - in a way that is relevant and meaningful to them.
It's our goal to educate/engage dads, and to see our culture change so that dads are recognized and affirm as an important part of a child's life - right from the start. So both mom and baby get what they need - an involved, responsible, and committed father.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Ignoring New Dads
3 comments:
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i had similar experiences getting ready to be a dad. i tried to ease the stress thumbing through some of the parenting and baby books piling up in our house, but so many were of the by-moms-for-moms variety. best thing I did was to pull together a group of dads I love and admire, feed them dinner, and have them tell me their stories. more about this "father's assembly" just published as an article over at Fathers.com (http://tinyurl.com/y8r7yp6)
ReplyDeleteAnother great idea by all of you! Kudos for recognizing that fathers are not recognized or engaged enough. For a first time father, having a child is just as much a life changing experience for him as it is for moms. A mother goes through so many steps leading up to the newborn (physical changes, mental stress etc), whereas a father, before the baby arrives, is more an outsider. But when that baby comes, that is when the father most needs a book like your New Dad's Pocket Guide.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.dadismydad.com
Shortly after my second son was born I was filling out the requisite hospital paperwork and was slightly taken aback by the fact that words like "father","husband", or even "spouse" simply did not appear anywhere in any of the forms. In each case I was referred to as "partner." For many years now Dads like myself have been in delivery rooms to witness the births of their children and to lend emotional support to their wives. We want to be acknowledged as the husbands and fathers we are.
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